Fate Accompli

Fate had one job. She bungled it. Badly.

For Moira, weaving fate tapestries is a thankless job — what with the rampant sexual harassment, unequal pay, and Apollo’s incompetent management. Then, the ambrosia really hits the fan. As Olympus crumbles, Moira desperately weaves a tapestry that she prays will spare her an eternity in Oblivion. Short on time and yarn, she must entwine her destiny with the fates of two mortal families, both cursed. What could possibly go wrong?

Twelve centuries later, Andolosia Petasos dreams of being the next Da Vinci. Only Fate has cursed him to make hats. It’s not Andolosia’s fault. After all, it was his Greek ancestor who stole Hermes’ teleportation hat and triggered the fall of Olympus. But the gods do not easily forgive and forget.

While delivering a custom hat to the powerful Sansone de Medici, Andolosia stumbles upon a prisoner, the feisty and foul- mouthed Carlotta Lux. Carlotta’s ancestor was Daphne, the water nymph who turned into a laurel tree while fleeing Apollo’s sexual advances. Now, Apollo has escaped Oblivion and possessed Sansone.

Of course, Andolosia uses Hermes’ hat to teleport Carlotta away. But the divinely-possessed Sansone is hot on their trail, and they cannot run forever. Their best hope is to find Hermes. There’s just one little hitch: Hermes is trapped in Oblivion.

Terry Pratchett meets Madeline Miller in this hilarious romp through Ancient Greece, the Italian Renaissance, and the heavens.